Sunday, July 22, 2012

Sunday Weigh-In (July 22, 2012)

Current Weight, as of 07/22/2012: 131.6 lbs.
Pounds lost since last weigh-in: 1.6 lbs.
Goal Weight: 125-130 lbs.
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So my weight-loss is going pretty well!  In the past two weeks, I have managed to lose the weight that I gained during my vacation and then some.  I feel so much better, stronger, lighter.  It took some changes in my eating and exercising, but I did it, and I am damned proud of myself.  I am now only 1.6 pounds away from the top range of my goal weight.

I have been told that I am exercising "too much" or not eating "enough".  I want to assure everyone that is far from true.  I make sure to eat at least 1200 calories a day -- usually more -- and I don't exercise for more than 45 minutes a day.  My exercising is taken from Jillian Michaels DVDs (I loooooove her!) or the Couch-to-5K app on my phone.   I have days where I eat unhealthily, but most days I make wise choices.  I think, for some, it can be alarming to see me at this weight -- let's face it, I haven't been this fit in my life, ever.  I spent the majority of my teenage years being overweight, obese at one point (I topped the scales at about 190 lbs. when I was 16).  

Hearing criticism or concern gets tiring.  Though I know my reasons for doing this, people seem to not believe me or choose to believe something else.  To put it succinctly, I am doing this for myself.  I don't want to get back to being "overweight" or "obese".  Exercising, eating right, living a healthy lifestyle has done nothing but wonders upon wonders for me.  My menstrual cycle is regular (and it hasn't been regular since I started it at 11).  My asthma is finally, finally under control.  I sleep better.  I feel healthier.  And most importantly, knowing that I can change something as big as my health and lifestyle gives me confidence that I can do whatever the hell I set my mind to.  I'm not doing this for a quick-fix; I'm doing this because I want to live longer.  I want to live.  

Choosing to change my life like this has not been easy.  It would be really easy for me to slip back into old habits.  I could stop exercising.  I could go back to eating whatever I damn well please throughout the day.  But I know what that feels like.  I know how unhappy it made me.  Thus, I don't ever plan on doing that again.
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I do have to admit that being fit has it's perks.  I have gone on a bit of a shopping binge lately, as a good part of my wardrobe is now too big for me to wear.  I used to loathe shopping -- loathe it!  At my heaviest, I spent money on music and books instead of clothes because I couldn't find anything or fit into anything that wasn't plus size.  Now, department stores and brands are making clothes in a variety of sizes; however, back then, I rarely found anything that fit me that wasn't in a plus-size clothing store.

Whereas I used to fit in a Large/X-Large top with size 14-16 pants (at my heaviest, mind you), I now fit into a Small/Medium top with size 6-8 pants.  Though women's sizes vary by a ton (a shirt I recently bought from Hollister is a Large, but hey, it's Hollister), I get a certain sense of pride when I realize that the size 8 jeans I'm trying on are too big.  Or that the medium skirt that I want is too big, and that I need to get a small.  And the damn small fits.  Looking at myself in the mirror makes me feel great and healthy.  Before, I would feel ugly, unhappy, fat, disgusted with how I looked.  

But now?  Now, I feel fantastic.  

More importantly, I feel healthy as hell.

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